kerble klosetHi, Everybody. Welcome to my inaugural column.

In the following weeks, I plan on covering a slew of style-related rants, such as:

  • why I’d rather die of malnutrition in bread bag shoes than wear Toms
  • why you shouldn’t take off your suit coat at a wedding
  • why pleated pants are only for people who count their money with a rake
  • why you should never eat food at a house where they say they wash their Crocs in the dishwasher
  • why a man should never sell another man a shirt that costs more than, say, $40
  • why you need to be as comfortable in a suit as you would in jeans and a t-shirt

and a host of other things that you may disagree with.  Remember that all of these rules are just suggestions, and there’s always an exception.  With that, let’s get to the root of the problem: your closet.

When the pianist Erik Satie passed away, they found seven identical gray suits in his wardrobe and little else.  The logic behind this was that he didn’t want to spend his time worrying about his clothes, and wanted to focus his attention on his music.  While I don’t recommend taking such an Asperger’s route to style, it makes a lot of sense.  The less you think about it, the more natural you’ll appear.

I keep my closet fairly organized. I’ve gone through a few iterations since I took this photo, but the idea is the same.  If you keep your clothing exactly where it needs to be, and are ruthless about clearing things out, you won’t have to think about getting dressed in the morning, and will look and feel great.

We are a culture of consumers and are often prone to buying new things instead of working with what we have.  Your first step is to take a long, hard look at what you own and go from there.  If you haven’t worn something in a year, get rid of it.  If you can no longer fit into an article of clothing, get it tailored or get rid of it.  If you’ve beaten the life out of a pair of shoes, get them re-soled or get rid of them.

The clothing you are hanging onto is taking up valuable space and cluttering your morning ritual.  You may have to spend a day or two trying everything on, item after item, until you get through this puzzle. I highly recommend having a lady or fella, whose opinion you trust, give you some harsh truth as you do this.  Show no mercy.

There are always exceptions, of course.  I have a few of my grandfather’s suits that I’d rather not send off to a thrift store and keep mostly for nostalgia’s sake. Use your best judgment, clean out your closet, and I’ll see you next time.

Cheers,

Faiz

 

 

 

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